Strangers become friends, friends become strangers

I heard that quote today.  It rung so true for me, I felt sad that it made sense to me.

Strangers become friends, but friends become strangers.

I think about the last 17 weeks, and I could count on one hand the friends who have reached out to Jim and I.  I mean really reached out, wanted to speak about Haydon, have let us cry and comforted us, have listened to our insane ramblings trying to make sense of everything....losing my son has been one of life's biggest learning experiences.

I don't feel particularly that I needed to learn these lessons, I was happy with my life.  But, I have learnt all the same.  Some of these lessons have been like a bitter pill to swallow, some of these lessons have left me feeling very alone at times.  But, also very loved at others.

I appreciate what my Mother says, that people don't always know what to say or how to bring comfort.  I don't look for too much though, or ask for too much.  I don't think I do anyway?
I ask for friends to be around, to text when I'm not strong enough to talk on the phone.  To visit if they say they will come, but will understand if I need to cancel at the last minute.
I ask for friends to laugh with me, or cry with me, talk about my son, or talk about other things, because this is my life.  I have always been the kind of friend who discusses what is happening in other's lives, I expect the same.  I don't think that's unreasonable.  Is it unreasonable? Am I expecting too much?  How have I supported other people in their time of loss?

Oh yeah......I tried to help... I called, I text, I emailed, I sent cards, I sent picture messages, I sent e-cards, I offered to meet for lunch, I went shopping, I helped to organise funerals, I visited and was a shoulder to lean on or cry on..........
maybe that's just me.

I have a phone filled with messages from the same people, the same people who always contact us and like to check that Jim and I are 'ok'. or as well as we can be.
We appreciate this.
We know who really cares, and who really is there for us.  We know who thinks about us, we know who tries to help.

So yep, that quote made perfect sense to me.  I am sad that it made perfect sense to me.

How tragic that as well as losing my son, the life that I knew and the people I held close are changing.

I am changing.  I have to.  I have no choice but to.  I have been left with no choice but to change.

I am now friends with people who were once strangers.  While some of my friends are becoming strangers.

This world and it's ways are so hard to understand.